Steven Ginsburg: 0:00

The disease is counting on the excuses and the obstacles to make sure that we can't provide what's needed for the remedy, and the remedies earned a day at a time.

Steve Coughran: 0:11

This is the Addiction Recovery Podcast with Steven T Ginsburg, founder of Restore Detox Centers in sunny California. Enjoy your experience, steven. First of all, I love going to group. Every time I'm out in California I just love the house, the restore house up in Poway, and oftentimes in group, I hear you talk about okay, work the program, work the program. It's really simple and that's how you stay sober. My question to you is after people leave restore right, or you know, let's just talk about it generally After somebody gets help and they go through rehab, how big of a commitment is it to working the program and focusing on one sobriety?

Steven Ginsburg: 0:57

Steve, thank you so much. I know you are very well aware not the least of which through your times being in group with me that yes, it is like banging a drum. I am very big on this part of the message and I repeat it over and over and over again. They talk about going to any length for our sobriety, and that description is perfect and poignant and right to the point. We must be willing to go to any length for our sobriety, and what that means is nothing comes before our sobriety, because anything that we put before our sobriety we're destined to lose. And just let me throw a quick thumbnail example out there.

Steven Ginsburg: 1:34

Someone's in acute crisis. They get sober. We get them together, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. They're healing, they get back to work, they get back to the family and suddenly they're not making the time that they need to hit a daily meeting. They're not making the time they need where they haven't found a sponsor. They're not doing their step work. That is a surefire path to when you will relapse, not if you will relapse, and it's very, very preventable. And, by the way, it's very frustrating for me, and I'm glad it's frustrating for me, because all we must do is our part, and that few simple things and relapse time is prevented. But if we don't engage in those things and we put other things first, relapse time comes and then we have to reboot and retool and the scary part is people die during relapses.

Steve Coughran: 2:20

Well, I mean, let's talk about this because, you know, before somebody goes into rehab to get help, you know obviously they're at rock bottom or something triggered them to get help. And then they go through the program, they get help, they have the support of the community. I mean, what's life after rehab? Is it a complete redo, rethink, redo, rethink? Because to me, like when I hear you say that, it's like wow, you can't just go back to your normal schedule because you know, if you don't find the time, then, like you said, if you're not putting your sobriety first, then you're going to run into a lot of issues. So help me understand that a little bit better. Because you know, I just feel like you know, I just think about my life and your life. I mean, it's so busy to try to add anything into my life right now. It just seems like crazy I'd have to give up some big things. So what are your thoughts on that?

Steven Ginsburg: 3:15

So that's very triggering for me. So I want to try and compartmentalize it and put it in the right context, because I'm very passionate about this. This is a little tongue in cheek, but it's also true. The only thing we need to, because we're not in crisis, we're not recognizing that powerlessness and unmanageability if there isn't truly a problem. And again, once we've identified that and we've gone into that mode of surrender and we are starting to adhere towards and pursue the solution Listen, there are some of the busiest people in the world, steve.

Steven Ginsburg: 3:48

They're clean and sober, they work a program and there's time for everything. Can you imagine the amount of time we waste and that we toil away when we're in pursuit of drugs and alcohol? It's astronomical. We ran the meter, not the least of which. Can you imagine the amount of dollars we waste buying drugs and alcohol? It's astronomical. So to say you can't take an hour in a day and hit a meeting is preposterous.

Steven Ginsburg: 4:11

Again, the entire Zoom platform means that a meeting is available on the hour, every hour, and, yes, we must go to in-person meetings. This is a contact sport, but Zoom meetings can also bridge the gap. Online meetings, online meeting communities, can bridge the gap. We must have a sponsor, that's an individual with working knowledge of the 12 steps, no matter which program we're going to. Then we go to meetings on top of the Zoom meetings, so that we are in community and communally we're participating, because it diffuses our built-in forgetter. And then we work the 12 steps. The 12 steps work in our life and we are of service.

Steven Ginsburg: 4:48

That's five things and within the context of any day, you're talking about an hour plus an hour and some phone calls every once in a while, a coffee meeting or a sit down. It's a very small amount of time to commit towards putting and continuing this psychic change that puts this disease that is out to kill me in remission. You coined it. You know my life. You know by the grace of God I have a busy life and a blessed life. There is not a day that I neglect or negate my program, because my program and a power greater than myself, which for me is my Lord and Savior, gave me all the busyness. So I've got to preserve and protect what provided the busyness for me. That is my sobriety.

Steve Coughran: 5:30

So let me ask you this, because we're both entrepreneurs and we both own our time what about for somebody who is trying to stay sober? They have family, they have kids in the morning that have to get off to school, and then they have work and they, you know, maybe they work for somebody else and there's, you know, they have to be there from eight to six or whatever it is. And they come home and there's responsibility, like how does somebody like that find time to like hop on a zoom call or to attend a meeting, because I'd imagine for most people that, like work in an office, it's probably tough to be like all right, hold on, I'm going to go to a meeting, I'll be back in a couple hours and still maintain their job, sure.

Steven Ginsburg: 6:13

So how did those same people I've got to do this because otherwise I'm going to fail and I can't fail because it's life and death how did they find time, amidst all those circumstances you just mentioned, to be at the bar, to go and hit the drug dealer up, to get high, to get drunk? How did they find that time amidst all those responsibilities? Hmm, and then I want to go right, and then that's very easy on my part, but let's go right into the. We can't just offer the obstacle, we've got to offer the opportunity. I feel called for that.

Steven Ginsburg: 6:43

So there's meetings that people can hit before work. There's meetings people can hit right after work. There's proper dynamics and conversations that must be had with the family of origin. Like, hey, this has got to be a priority and, believe me, I'm sure they will be very agreeable. You have a family member in crisis. You're like by all means, you know, daddy needs to go to a meeting, mommy needs to go to a meeting, mommy needs to meet with her sponsor. You are able to make time for that, and it's amazing how much more time we find when we have the gift of clarity, when we have continuity in our life, when we have sobriety in our life, when we can hangover in our life.

Steven Ginsburg: 7:15

Okay, so you can see, I'm very passionate about this, because the disease is counting on the excuses and the obstacles to make sure that we can't provide what's needed for the remedy, and the remedies earned a day at a time through footwork. And these things are a must. They're not negotiable, because if we're not gonna participate in the must, we are going to relapse, and very often we relapse, we end up dead or in institutions. There's a much better way. Yes, there's some time management involved. Yes, we've got to make the main thing the main thing. Yes, we have to facilitate some changes and have some conversations, but it's not a sacrifice, it's a gain and it can be done and it is done. Millions of people globally are participating in life like this and it's every walk of life, with every type of schedule, and they're all managing the time. It's possible. It's the disease that tells us that it is not.

Steve Coughran: 8:12

Yeah, well, I guess it's true, because, let's just say, I got diagnosed with some type of disease and the doctors are like, okay, you need to come in every day and do dialysis or you're going to die. Like obviously I'd make things work. That's what you're saying Ultimately.

Steven Ginsburg: 8:21

That is exactly what I'm saying, and it is preposterous to me that people aren't willing to do their part and listen. I'm going to tell you something else. It's not even their fault. We're all sick and we suffer from a disease that tells us we don't have a disease, and it's the biggest thing that I see happen. Things start to get good, and in a hurry, and that's a beautiful blessing, but it's a liability as well. And the very elements that provided things to start getting good again. We start to neglect and negate those elements. We're not intentional about the pursuit of them, but the people that are Steve I want you to know this.

Steven Ginsburg: 8:57

I just had two alumni. By God's grace, this isn't because of me. This, the people that are Steve. I want you to know this. I just had two alumni. By God's grace, this isn't because of me, this is because of what has been so freely given. I just had two alumni who have had chronic relapses in the past, who both just took a year. How, why? And let me backfill it very quickly. They are working a program, they are in meetings all the time, they have sponsors, they are working and have worked the 12 steps, and the 12 steps are working in their life and they are being of service. That provides the psychic change and the 12 steps provide the psychic change and the remission occurs and continues. That the daily reprieve is gained and if the daily work is neglected or negated, the relapse is on. There's a prelapse before a relapse. The relapse is on. There's a pre-lapse before a relapse and this is so important.

Steve Coughran: 9:42

I like that, and I mean all of your messages. The thing that I love about your approach, Steven, is just it's simple. You keep it very simple. It's not like you have this formula that is so complex and you need to do this and you need to do that and you're like, wow, wait, go back to step three, Like explain that again. It's very simple, but cut and dry, but yeah, but people can overly complicate it, Right?

Steven Ginsburg: 10:07

It's simple, I'm complicated and I'm going to make it to myself first, and when I start getting in the way and when I start letting my head get, get the best of me, when I start running around with. Today my day is packed, but by quantifying it and making it small, by starting my day for me. I start my day with my Bible verse, I start my day with the daily reflection and everything AAP, then I do my version of prayer time and then I'm off and running. At some point today I don't know when yet above and beyond facilitating group, I'm going to hit a meeting. I talked to my sponsor yesterday.

Steven Ginsburg: 10:39

I've worked the 12 steps and at some point I'll make an egregious mistake today and I'll work the 10th step. And that's just all part of my DNA and it's ingrained in my DNA, and a day at a time. And I've got to get through today first. In November I'll take 20 years, but I've got to get through today first. I can't look at November in 20 years, but it's by doing these things on a daily basis because I'm God fearing and disease fearing. And it's very small. My problem is looming in large. The solution is small and it can be done. People lose their willingness to do it, they complicate it and they neglect and negate what has delivered them the promises.

Steve Coughran: 11:17

So I mean, what are the lame excuses that that you hear oftentimes, where that people put in front of their sobriety. I mean I'm sure you hear it all the time it's like, well, I do you know. But I mean, yeah, and you know, like what do you hear? Like what are the excuses?

Steven Ginsburg: 11:33

You know, and, by the way, and and I empathize with the plight I want to really stay an empath. So there's my disclaimer, so that it can all be loving and nurturing and empowering. I understand we've all got life on life's terms going on. I'm so busy with work. Well, how come you're so busy with work? It's because you're sober. There's so much stuff going on with the kids. Why are you present for your children? It's because you're sober. My wife needs time. Why does your wife even want time with you? It's because you're sober. Work is off the chain. I've got all these new projects. Why? It's because you're sober.

Steven Ginsburg: 12:07

And if you're not going to do the things to maintain that remission and maintain the sobriety, don't worry about that list. It's going to get small and it's going to turn into. I've been thrown out of the house. I've been arrested, I killed someone with my car and make no mistake about it. Anyone out there who's got the cynical jaded hearing right now? They're like, I'm them and they're me. If you're like me and you suffer from what I suffer from and I am bodily and mentally different than my fellows, we are in the same boat and it's the similarities, not the differences, and it can be done. I've got some of the greatest executives I've ever met in my life People I am embarrassed that I even get to talk to them. They are so educated and accomplished and they are clean and sober and they are. This simple, simple program is delivering them on a daily basis. That reprieve and they are participating in their sobriety daily and if they can do it, we all sure can.

Steve Coughran: 12:55

Yeah, I love it. That's great. We want to hear from you what are your thoughts on this episode. You can email us at hello at restore detox centers. com. Also, if you want to get access to other resources or learn more about what we're up to, you can find more on our website at restore detox centers. com. And Steven, always a pleasure doing these episodes with you and it's been great.

Steven Ginsburg: 13:19

Steve, thank you so much and I just want to add a footnote because, again, you, you know the topics that really hit the center of my bullseye. If you are out there and you have back chatter of this disease in your ear telling you you can't, you won't, you shouldn't, there's no way, I am telling you we could have never met each other in a million years and I may never cross paths with you. But if you will reach out, I am all too happy to jump on the phone with you or exchange an email with you and we can walk through why you can and why you should and why you must. Our lives are all at stake. We are here with you and for you and all things. I want everyone to have a safe and sober day and please work your program.